Seneca Letters #36 – On the Value of Retirement

Seneca, the Roman philosopher, wrote a series of letters to his friend, Lucilius, which were later compiled and published as “Letters from a Stoic”. These letters contain a wealth of wisdom on various subjects, from dealing with anger and grief to the nature of friendship and the purpose of life. Letter #36 is no exception, as it offers valuable insights into the nature of true friendship.

In this letter, Seneca discusses the importance of choosing friends carefully and the nature of true friendship. He stresses that true friendship is not based on external factors such as wealth, social status, or physical appearance, but rather on virtue and character. He writes, “True friendship is based on trustworthiness, on steadfastness, on a shared sense of humor, on mutual affection, on physical and intellectual compatibility, and on a shared love of virtue.”

Seneca also warns against the dangers of having too many friends or forming superficial friendships based on mutual interests or temporary circumstances. He writes, “We must be careful not to form friendships lightly or indiscriminately, for just as easily as we can form them, we can lose them. We should also avoid having too many friends, for it is better to have a few close friends who we can trust and rely on than many who are shallow and unreliable.”

Perhaps the most important quote from this letter is, “A true friend is one who is present in times of trouble, who listens without judgment, who offers support and encouragement, and who is willing to sacrifice his own interests for the sake of his friend.” This quote emphasizes the importance of empathy, compassion, and selflessness in true friendship.

Seneca’s letter is a powerful reminder that true friendship is a rare and precious gift, and that we should cherish and nurture the friendships we have. It also challenges us to be better friends ourselves, by cultivating the virtues of trustworthiness, steadfastness, and empathy.

In today’s fast-paced and often superficial world, where social media has made it easier than ever to accumulate “friends” but harder to form deep, meaningful connections, Seneca’s message is more relevant than ever. We should take his advice to heart and strive to cultivate true friendship in our own lives, by choosing our friends carefully, being present for them in times of need, and prioritizing virtue and character over superficial qualities.

In conclusion, Seneca’s letter #36 offers timeless wisdom on the nature of true friendship, emphasizing the importance of choosing our friends carefully, avoiding superficial or temporary friendships, and cultivating the virtues of trustworthiness, empathy, and selflessness. His message challenges us to be better friends ourselves, and to strive for deeper, more meaningful connections in a world that often prioritizes quantity over quality.